Reason #35: Being a Big Loser

Sometimes I wonder if Biggest Loser's Bob Harper and Jillian Michaels when the cameras finish rolling, go back to a special VIP room where only super-fit personal trainer types are allowed to park their super-tight asses. There, they sip light import beers and make fun of all the moo-cows they scream at on the show. I don't know about you, but I want Bob and Jillian to like me. If you're less than 100 lbs overweight, you're not eligible to go on the program. But, if you're tubbier than that, you're within the desired range, and at risk of having the duo yell at you. Although some might argue that being disciplined by Jillian wouldn't be an all-bad thing (no comment).

Reason #34: Beer

Benjamin Franklin once said, "Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy." We agree wholeheartedly. And while you should enjoy beer in moderation, it's acceptable to go a little overboard once in awhile and visit the Land of Lush. If you're heavy, though, it takes a heckuva lot more Pabst (or Miller, or Red Stripe, or whatever your brew of choice may be) to attain that pleasant buzz--which means paying the bartender a bigger share of your hard-earned money. Stay thin and save money? I'll drink to that.

Reason #33: Doctor's Orders

If you're fit and healthy, you'll never have to hear a doctor tell you that you need to lose weight, eat better, get more exercise, etc. You probably know that you could stand to part with a few pounds, and that you should get to the gym more often, and that you should maybe eat fewer Big Mac value meals. However, having someone in a white coat tell you all that makes your un-fitness all that more real, and more than a little embarrassing.

Reason #32: Jeans

Curves--like the ones so ably sported by Mad Men actress Christina Hendricks--look fabulous in jeans. Stunning, in fact. Fat...well, not so much. Further, it is a hell of a lot easier finding an affordable pair of jeans to fit your bod if you're in decent shape, compared to when you're than blobby and totally out of shape. And no one should ever--EVER!--have to wear a pair of jeans with elastic in the waistband. Those aren't even jeans; they're wearable humiliation.

By the way, if you're digging the pics of Ms. Hendricks sporting jeans and fetching her dry cleaning, there's more where they came from--you can either click the pic at left for the rink, or just click RIGHT HERE

Reason #31: Energy!

OMG, when you're in great shape, you feel GREAT! GREATGREATGREAT! It's like being on drugs, only cheaper, and you're not going to overdose on fitness. You'll just feel less like a couch-bound lump, and more like a well-fueled machine. This means you can do all the stuff you're obligated to do throughout the day (work, watching kids, etc.) AND be a lot less likely to crash when it comes time to do stuff for yourself. Me time is awesome.

Reason #30: Grocery Bill

If you eat a lot of food, and that food you've procured from the grocery store and chow down while you lounge slothfully around the house is processed crap food, your grocery bill will be pretty danged high. However, if you purchase fresh fruits, veggies, grains, lean meats, and other such vittles, the number at the bottom of your supermarket receipt will be much lower. An added bonus if you're a city dweller commuting by bus or train, you'll have less to carry, and can probably fit all your groceries in a couple of those reusable cloth bags (see the lovely example from Archie McPhee at left).

Reason #29: Weenie Neck

Thankfully I'm not so fat that the back of my neck looks like a pack of hot dogs--although if I'm not careful and don't continue trying to mend my ways, it could look frankfurterish. Although it's nice to enjoy a nice, hot wiener every once in a while, I would prefer that no part of my anatomy ever resemble a pack of wieners. I love saying "wieners." Wieners, wieners, wieners. Hee, hee!